A Brisbane bikie gang invaded a young girls home last weekend when she accidentally left the door open. The gang forced her to make them food and swam in her pool before trying to enter her bedroom. Eye witnesses said the young girl became cagey about the contents of her room and “flew into a rage” when the gang tried to enter. Surprised by the sudden ferocity the gang members immediately back peddled turning to emotional manipulation and psychological attacks instead. Seeing the girl was undeterred by these tactics the gang quickly left before police arrived.

Our investigative reporters have discovered that the girl, who now has been identified as Al-Anna Raft, may have been part of a rival fight gang and her room could have been used as storage for weapons, drugs, or money. Our investigative photographers sneaked into her backyard to try and take pictures of her room however unfortunately fell into a green swamp and needed to buy new camera equipment. All other traditional attempts to see inside her room until now have led to our reporters being apprehended by police and forced to explain themselves. The fight gang, who’s name we can not divulge, have also sent cease and desist letters stating that stalking and privacy violations go against their member protection policy.

Al-Anna, who is quoted as saying “You’re worse than the bikie gang, wait… you’re IN the bikie gang.” and “What are you doing in my closet?” is remarkably calm about the whole thing. While we morn the loss of a great investigative journalist (funeral to be held next Saturday at the Barns Estate) we do finally know that her room is filled with all the standard affair such as bed, desk, grenades, satanic altars and fairy floss however it was also home to a baffling number of ping pong balls and red cups. What devious use does she have for these? It seems we will never know.

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